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There is POWER in "Ownership"

Alright ladies and gents, we’ve made it through our first installment of the P.O.W.E.R series. The first being There is P.O.W.E.R in “Positive Terms, and maybe you’ve been trying to figure out the “O” for the next installment. I’ve had people guess that it’s “Organization” and “Originality”. Both great guesses, but nope! This week’s installment is focused on the fact that There is P.O.W.E.R in “Ownership”!


This week I want us to dive into “Ownership”. Ownership of our lives, our goals, our outlook on life. This is such a huge concept that can be applied outside of the spectrum of Goal Setting. I believe that most often than not, it’s easy for us, an almost natural path to take to blame others or things for why things are the way they are in our lives. Rarely taking ownership of our role in how we arrived to the place that we currently are. In other terms, making excuses.


Story Time

I admit that have an uncanny ability doing this and I work my hardest to catch myself in the act. For example just last week I was packing a weekend bag to head up to Raleigh for the Dreamville Festival. I knew that I wanted to bring my fanny back and I thought, keyword thought, that it was upstairs in the guest bedroom. As I was getting ready to load up the car I went to go look for my fanny pack and I didn’t find it.


I started to get frustrated and flustered looking everywhere imaginable and demanding my boyfriend assist me. Eventually I began to place blame on him for misplacing this item. Thought of all the times he’s cleaned up and moved my items, instead of taking ownership of the fact that I don’t put my stuff back in the same place which is why I never know where it is.


Now that was just an average everyday of life example. Imagine that you’ve created this goal, whether it be short or long term, and as you’re attempting to achieve it you run into roadblocks. Sometimes those roadblocks just make you want to give up and concede to defeat. So instead of admitting your fault in the negative or unwarranted results you blame it on the roadblock.

 

Personal Dive


One of my more medium-to-large life goals is to go back to school to learn graphic design properly. I completely understand that I could continue to self teach myself but it’s simply not what I want. It’s been this ever evolving goal since high school.

  • First, I wanted to major it in college and I did at Campbell University (a small private school). My parents pulled me out at age 17; they felt I wasn’t serious about school, and that was big considering they signed Parent-Plus loans for me to attend. Let's be honest, looking back I wasn't serious. I was just happy to be done with high school and out the house. Had my first taste of "freedom".


  • Then, right before heading off to basic training for the Army I applied to several schools, but I didn’t meet their requirements for a graphic design program. Or so I told myself I didn’t. I never took the opportunity to ask anyone for clarification on the requirements. I never utilized the people in my corner to help me come up with that portfolio that I needed. Instead I told myself that my work wasn't good enough.


  • Next, I got accepted to UNC Charlotte and saw inside of the first year that the Communications Studies concentration in Mass Media track wasn’t for me. Sat down and convinced myself that it was more important for me to graduate in 4 years rather than switch tracks to Graphic Design. I finally met the requirements but it meant starting my 4 years over basically. I took on the pressures and dreams and aspirations of my family to be perfect. To do it in four years. Even changed my major two more times before landing on the actual degrees that I have. I shouldn't have. I should have switched. Taken the "hit" because at the end of the day it would've been a degree in something I loved. Not to say I don't like how my life has turned out. because I accept my role in it.


  • Lastly, I can’t forget the latest time I’ve looked into going back to school. Looking into applying to Central Piedmont Community College. I found out that I don’t qualify for the regular student loans given through FAFSA. Instead I’d need to take out a private loan; something I wasn’t ready to tackle, and that's okay. I stopped myself because I know what I can and cannot handle at the moment.


In each of those four instances there was always an option. An option to place blame on an outside factor or an option to own up to my role in how those situations turned out, how I decided to react, how I decided to take action. Don’t get me wrong here. I understand that sometimes things are completely out of our control. The questions to are did you blame your inability to fulfill your goal because of that obstacle? Did you try to see if there was a solution around it?


Often times we stop and that is the problem.

I will not stop trying to pursue my goal of getting my degree in Graphic Design. It means something to me. It’s a step towards a larger goal honestly. I may at times in the moment wallow in sadness, maybe even place blame on the roadblock but I will pick myself up and continue to pursue. Continue to move forward.

 

The last thing I want to leave you with is that sometimes we’re too worried about what people think, how they will react, how they feel, how they will judge us. It’s like we rent out space in our lives for the opinions of others to be the foundation for how we feel about ourselves or what we choose to do with our lives.


Your life is yours. Do with it how you see fit.

Some questions I want you to take with you this week and consider are:

  1. What do you feel is out of your hands?

  2. Are you waiting around for someone else to notice your efforts?

  3. Are you listing off all the people that are standing in your way?

  4. Have you taken time to assess what is within your scope of influence?

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